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An Open Letter to Society: I fucking hate you.

Updated: May 27, 2023

Hear me out.

Before I defend my feelings like they matter, understand what I think of love and hate:

They can only co-exist. One can not exist without the other. Judge this piece by that measure.

Let's get started.


Dear Society,

I'm writing as I stare over a metaphorical cliff, looking down at flames and despair. What have you done?

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

Does this ring a bell? It should. Martin Luther King had a dream, and seems like you've totally lost the fucking plot.

Achieving equality of opportunity, that is that each human having the same opportunities without prejudicial bias, is a noble goal that I can get behind. But you seem to have moved from equality of opportunity to equality of OUTCOME. I don't know about you, but when I hire a mechanic, or a hair dresser, I'm looking for the best.

I'm not looking for a skin colour. I'm not looking for a gender. I want my hair to come out looking fabulous like I'm Ru fucking Paul, and want the most skilled coiffeur to handle what little is left of my locks.

I want the best hands handling the tick-tock-grrr-poot of my car. So what's my point, Society?

We've moved into what I call irrational quota territory: where an immutable trait disqualifies you from applying for a position, a scholarship, even research chairs:


"Canada Research Chair at Laval University: the exclusion of "the non-disabled white man" denounced.

A competition from the Department of Biology of the Faculty of Science and Engineering at Université Laval, which invites applications for positions in Canada Research Chairs (CRC), is causing a lot of reaction on social networks, when it excludes from the outset "the non-disabled white man", regardless of his skills, denounces comedian Guy Nantel.

Now, this is just one example, but we even have Justin Trudeau who declared proudly that parity in his cabinet was a political priority, he even promised it.

Fancy this, if you will:

You just cheered for a quota instead of cheering for the best, most competent team, to run our county. Did I get that wrong?

You, Society, didn't want the BEST at the HELM, you preferred PARITY. Does that make sense? It sure as shit doesn't to me.

Do you not want members of your Society to have EQUAL OPPORTUNITY to apply, with an equal consideration, to be running this shit-show called Canada?

I could not care any less about colour, gender, if you're a furry on week-ends: if you're the BEST, I want you on my team. As a very competitive female, if I were to find out that I scored a top-level C-position for a corporation because I have a vagina and not because I was the best candidate, all hell would break loose. Fuck you. What a fucking insult.

I take PRIDE in kicking ass, don't you? So why do I use the word Hate, Society? I use the word Hate because I grew up to love you. I grew up hearing Martin Luther King's speech and thinking of how far we had come since then, with more enlightenment on the way.

My teens exposed me to the culture that exists in Quebec beyond the individual idiots from my youth, more specifically, on the island of Montreal, and how I could learn so much, from food, to language, to art and architecture - it was and still is, a mosaic of the world, on this tiny piece of land.

You were not perfect, Society, but gosh were you beautiful to watch. Sure, you had things to work on when it came to individuals with prejudice not affording equal opportunities to others, but fuck, you were striving for it. But now? It's all backwards. You get more opportunity if you have a certain immutable trait or another. This is EVIL, and I will take no part in it. I love you so much, but absolutely hate you for this.

How can you sleep at night, Society? Do you not see the harm you're causing? Imagine this conversation between a father and his 12 year old child, should you continue down this path of segregation, sexism, racism, name the ism:

"Son, I love your Lego Eiffel tower, but you should think of something other than becoming an engineer."
"Why? It's so fun! I love building things! Look, I even used Mindstorms to automate little cars driving around! I programmed my own bots!"
"I can see that my boy, but there are too many white men in engineering and your application won't be considered. We'll focus on something else, OK?'

You know what that reminds me of, Society?

Another story. It's about a young girl who had her head in the stars and wanted to be an astronaut. She would have pursued that a career and probably been top of class - but her teacher, a female, discouraged her because "Women aren't astronauts. Maybe astronomer would be better, Helen."

That little girl was my mother.

So, Society, consider this my official resignation. I will not take part in what you seem to think is progress.

I'm sure Martin and I would agree, but maybe he would have had the fortitude to keep fighting.

See you later, maybe.

With love and hate.



If you got this far, respect. I can't imagine myself telling any one of the little white boys in those classes to give up on engineering. FUCK YOU.

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Meh. Stuff.